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Friday Philosophy – Dyslexia Defence League

NB This post has nothing to do with Oracle or even technology really. It’s just some thoughts about one aspect of my life.

I know I’ve mentioned this once before, though it was in an early blog post when I had a readership of about 8, but I am mildly dyslexic. If you want to know how I found out I was dyslexic then check out the original post. I’m quite fond of that post, as a non-technical one, though almost no one read it.

The thing is, I now cringe slightly when I say I am Dyslexic. I’ve sat on this post for weeks, wondering if I should post it. You see, it seems to me that dyslexia, along with some other oddities of perception, have over the last few years almost become a thing to be proud of. A banner to wave to show how great you are. “Hey, look at me, I am this good even though I have Dyslexia” or even “I am great because I have dyslexia”. Maybe I am just a little sensitive about it but it seems to me that more and more people make a thing about it. If I am being candid, I feel a little proud that I did OK academically despite it {I should point out there is no proven link between dyslexia and IQ but in exams you get marked down for spelling and slow reading speed means it takes longer to, well, read stuff!} and in the past I have been very open about mentioning it. Hey, this is my second blog on dyslexia!

However, I’ve had it suggested to me in the past that I use it as a defense for being lazy – Can I prove I am dyslexic? Does it really impact me that much? Well, actually no I cannot prove it and has it impacted me? Not a great deal I guess as I can read pretty much anything {I did say it was mild. Scientific papers and anything with very long words can be a challenge, but isn’t that true of everyone?}. My reading speed is about 120,150 words a minute. Average is about 250wpm. My wife seems to read at about 500wpm :-)

Also, don’t get me wrong, I fully appreciate that looking at a challenge you have and taking the benefits from it that you can is a very healthy attitude. If I remember right it was Oliver Sacks in one of his books (“the man who mistook his wife for a hat” maybe) who describes a man with sever Tourette’s syndrome {which is more often all about physical ticks and uncontrolled motions rather than the famous “swearing” aspect of it} who could somehow take advantage of his physical manifestations in his jazz drumming. He could just make it flow for him. But when he took treatment to control the physical issues, his jazz drumming suffered. He really wanted the benefit of the drugs for day-to-day life but keep the Tourettes for jazz. So he took the drugs during the week and came off just before the weekends when he played. Neat.

Does Dyslexia help me? I think I am more of a diagrams and pictures person than a text person because of my dyslexia and I think I maybe look at things a little differently to most people at times – because of the differences in how I perceive. That can help me see things that maybe others have missed? Maybe an advantage. I’ll take that.

Also, in my case at least, dyslexia is not an issue for me comprehending or constructing written prose. I think I write some good stuff at times.

But I don’t want to be dyslexic. Frankly, it p122es me off.

I’ll give you an example. I did a blog post a few weeks back and it had some script examples in it. I had nearly finished it when I realised I had constantly spelt one word utterly wrong. The spell checker picked it up. But just before I posted it, I realised I had also got my column aliases utterly wrong. I have a little set of rules for generating table and column aliases, it is not complex, but in my head the leading letters of a word are not always, well, the leading letters. I had to alter my scripts and then re-run them all as I knew if I tried to unpick the spelling mistakes manually I would mess it up, I’ve been there before. It took me hours. I can really do without wasting that time. {Update, since originally drafting this post the same situation with another technical post has occurred}. Then there is the embarrassment of doing something like spelling the name of a column wrong when you design and build a database. I did that in a V8 database when renaming columns was still not a simple task {was it really Oracle 9 release 2 before column rename was introduced?}. The database went live and accrued a lot of data before anyone made an issue of it. It then kept getting mentioned and I had to keep explaining.

I don’t see Dyslexia as a badge of honour and every time I see someone being proud of it (or to my odd mind it seems they are proud of it) or suggesting they are better than average for overcoming it (again, maybe it is just my perception), I just feel uncomfortable. I think all and everyone of us has something we have had to overcome to be “normal”.

Yet, on reading that above paragraph back, it is simply insulting to people who have fought and striven to overcome severe dyslexia or other issues with perception or communication. I certainly do not mean that (and I apologise unreservedly to anyone who is now fuming at me because of my callousness).

Maybe that is my issue with the whole topic – I am not uncomfortable with the notion of being proud to have overcome something like dyslexia and I admire people who cope with other conditions which make it harder for them to get by in our culture, but I just can’t see why you would be proud of the condition or want to use it as a bragging right.

I guess I want to be able to just acknowledge my dyslexia, point out it is no big deal in my case but it is why I spell like a 10 year old. It is as significant as the fact I’m scared of heights. I guess I cringe a little when I say it as I don’t want to be seen to be making excuses and I certainly do not feel, that in my case at least. I have won through against the odds. Maybe I’ve been a little hard-done-by occasionally but haven’t we all?

Friday Philosophy – Blogging Style and Aim

I’ve recently looked back at some of my earlier blog postings and also some notes I made at the time I started. I had a few aims at the start, pretty much in this order:

  • A place to put all those Oracle thoughts and ideas, for my own benefit
  • Somewhere to record stuff that I keep forgetting
  • I’d started commenting on other blogs and felt I was maybe too verbal on them
  • To increase my profile within the Oracle community
  • To share information, because I’m quite socialist in that respect
  • To learn more

It very quickly morphed into something slightly different though.

Firstly, it is not really somewhere that I record thoughts and ideas or where I record stuff that I forget. When I am busy, I sometimes only get half way to the bottom of resolving an issue or understanding some feature of Oracle. I tend to create little documents about them but I can lose track of them. I initially intended to put these on my blog. The thing is though, I don’t feel I can blog about them because I might be wrong or I raise more questions than I answer. I don’t think a public blog about technology is a good place to have half-baked ideas and I certainly don’t want people:

  1. reading and believing something that is wrong
  2. thinking I do not know what I am talking about
  3. seeing my rough notes as boy are they rough, often with naughty words in them and slang. Converting them to a familly-friendly format takes time. 

You see, there is the point about increasing my profile in the community. Part of me hates the conceit that you have to be seen as all-knowing or never wrong, as no one is all-knowing and never wrong. In fact, I think most of us find it hard to like people who put themselves as such.  But if I put out a blog saying “it works this way” and I am wrong or I simply say it in a clumsy way or I assume some vital prior knowledge, I could be making people’s lives harder not easier, so I spend a lot of effort testing and checking. It takes me a lot, lot longer to prepare a technical blog than I ever thought it would before I started. And yes, I accept I will still get it wrong sometimes.

Another consideration is that I make my living out of knowing a lot about Oracle. If I post a load of blogs saying something like “gosh I wish I understood how Oracle locks parts of the segment as it does an online table rebuild and handles the updates that happen during it”, then I obviously don’t know about that. Or I put out a post about how I currently think it works and I’m wrong. Tsch, I can’t be that good! How much should I have to think about how I am selling myself as a consultant? There is a difference between being liked and being perceived as good at what you do. If you want someone to design a VLDB for you, you probably don’t care if s/he is a nice person to spend an evening in the pub with - but you certainly care if they seem to be fundamentally wrong about oracle partitioning.

Balancing that, if you saw my recent post on Pickler Fetch you will see that I was wrong about a couple of things and there was some stuff I did not know yet. But I learnt about those wrong things and lack of knowledge, so I feel good about that. That was one of my original aims, to learn. Not only by having to check what I did but by people letting me know when I was wrong.

What about style? I can be quite flippant and, oh boy, can I go on and on. I know some people do not like this and, if you want a quick solution to an oracle problem, you probably do not want to wade through a load of side issues and little comments. You just want to see the commands, the syntax and how it works. Well, that is what the manuals are for and there a lot of very good web sites out there that are more like that. If you do not like my verbose style then, hey that’s absolutely fine.  But I like to write that way and so I shall.

So after over 2 years of blogging, I seem to have settled into a style and my aims have changed.

  • I try to be helpful and cover things in detail.
  • I try to polish what I present a lot, lot more than I do for my own internal notes. Maybe too much.
  • I’m going to write in a long-winded way that some people will not enjoy but it is my style.
  • I’m going to try and worry less about looking perfect as I am not.

I suppose what I could do is start a second, private blog with my half-baked stuff on it. But I just don’t think I’ve got the time :-)

 

 

 

 

I am Neo off the Matrix (apparently)

I know I have mentioned it before, but I am a big fan of the OEM performance screens that are derived from the ASH/AWR information. One of the things I really like about it is the immediate information it gives you, in one glance, that things are “not normal”. Once you notice that things are not normal you can then, within a few seconds, get a feel for what is still probably OK and where you have something that has changed.

As an example of the immediate information, I recently came back to my desk and glanced at my OEM performance screen. It was showing the below:


This will not be an interesting picture to you, but to me it tells me a lot about my system

“data load has just ran” I said to my comrade-in-arms. “which one?” he asked. “The Delta – It ran the quick plan. But it started a bit late, 12:15. Oh, and looks like the transaction view code has swapped back to the full table scan plan and the summary code is not playing up at the moment.”

“you’re turning into Neo you are – can you see a lady in a red dress???” he asked.

That was of course a reference to the “Matrix” films where at times you see the virtual world displayed on a screen as a stream of characters running down the screen – but once you get used to it you can apparently “see” what is going.

The screen shot above is not even actually a very good example of what the performance screens can show you. One of my minor complaints about the performance screens is that it scales to show the greatest of the largest peak or a number of sessions to match the number of CPUs (real or fake) that are available to you. So if you have more CPU available than you need, you can’t see much detail in the graph. And if you have had a nasty peak of activity, again, all detail is squeezed out. In my case, the box is sized to cope in 12 months and the system is new, so activity is scuttling along the bottom of the graph.

However, “poor” though the example is, it told me what was going on across my system at a glance, something about the major tasks we are running, that one problem is currently occurring and that several of the other issues I need to keep an eye out for are not occurring.

That is why I love these screens – I recognise “my” activity patterns from the graph, I now recognise the SQL IDs for my key statements. If I see a pattern in the graph I don’t recognise, I need to check things out immediately. Three or four times over the last 2 weeks I have spotted an issues, started investigating and found out the cause before the Operations desk has even noticed an issue.

Oh, and what is SQL type 189? It is a merge statement. Our implementation of OEM is a little old, it does not correctly interpret that SQL command type. It might be a little old, it is still a lot useful.

Where is Sun?

First of all, may I wish everyone who comes by my blog a heartfelt Happy New Year.
Secondly, I promise I’ll blog more often and more on technical aspects this year than I have for most of 2010.
Thirdly, I’ll admit the title to this blog is nothing to do with the hardware company now owned by Mr Larry Ellison, but is about the huge glowing ball of fire in the sky (which we have not seen a lot of here in England and Wales for the last couple of weeks – not sure about Scotland but I suspect it has been the same). I apologise for the blatantly misleading (and syntactically poor) title.

A quick question for you – It is the depths of winter for most of us, and it has been unusually cold here in the UK and much of Europe. When are we, as a planet, furthest from the Sun during winter? January the 1st? The Shortest day (21st December)? The day the evening start drawing out (December 14th)?
I think many in the Northern Hemisphere will be surprised to learn that we are closest to the sun today (3rd Jan 2011). A mere 147.104 million kilometers from the centre of our solar system. I mentioned this to a few friends and they were all taken aback, thinking we would be furthest from the warmth of the sun at the depths of our winter.

Come the 4th July 2011 it is not only some strange celebration in the US about having made the terrible decision to go it alone in the world {Joke guys!}, but is the day in the year that the Earth is furthest from the sun – 152.097 million kilometers. That is about 3.39% further away and, as the energy we receive from the sun is equal to the square of the distance, does account for a bit of a drop in the energy received. {Surface of a sphere is 4*pi*(R{adius}squared), you can think of the energy from the sun as being spread over the sphere at any given distance}.

Some of you may be wondering why this furthest/closest to the sun does not match the longest/shortest day. As some of you may remember, I explained about the oddities of the shortest day not matching when the nights start drawing out about this time last year. It is because as we spin around our own pole and around the sun, things are complicated by the fact that the earth “leans over” in it’s orbit.

Check out this nice web site where you can state the location and month you want to see sunrise, sunset, day length and (of particular relevance here) the distance from the sun for each day.

I find it interesting that many of the things us most of us see as “common sense” are often not actually right (I always assumed that the shortest day coincided with both the evenings starting to draw out and mornings getting earlier until I stumbled across it when looking at sunset times – I had to go find a nice Astronomer friend to explain it all to me). I also like the fact that a very simple system – a regularly spinning ball circling a large big “fixed point” in a fixed way – throws up some oddities due to little extra considerations that often go overlooked. Isn’t that so like IT?

That lean in the Earth’s angle of spin compared to the plane we revolve around the sun is slowly rotating too, so in a few years (long, long, long after any of us will be around to care) then the furthest point in the orbit will indeed match the northern hemisphere winter. Again like IT, even the oddities keep shifting.

Friday Philosophy – Run Over by a Bus

I chaired a session at the UKOUG this week by Daniel Fink, titled “Stop Chasing your tail: Using a Disciplined Approach to Problem Diagnosis”. It was a very good talk, about having a process, an approach to solving your IT problems and that it should be a process that suits you and your system. All good stuff and I utterly agree with what he said.

But it was a passing comment Daniel made that really set me thinking. It was something like:

You should be considering how people will look after the system after you have gone, the classic ‘what will we do if you are hit by a bus’….. No, I don’t like thinking like that, that phrase… I prefer ‘after you win the lottery and retire to a great life’.

It just struck a chord with me. Mr Fink’s {and I do go all formal when I intend respect} take on this is a far more positive way of looking at the situation of leaving the system in a state that others can look after once you are no longer able to help. The “Bus” phrase is very, very common, at least in the UK and I suspect in the US, and it is a very negative connotation. “Make sure it all works as something nasty is going to happen to you, something sudden, like being smeared across the tarmac by 25 tons of Greyhound doing 50mph, something basically fatal so you can’t prepare and you can’t help any more”. So, not just moved on, but dead.

Daniel made me realise that we should be looking at this from totally the other perspective and that doing so is much, much, much better. “Make it work so that they love you, even when you have gone away to a happier situation – one involving no road-based unpleasantness at all”.

Everyone leaves their job eventually and I like to think it is often for more positive reasons. Like retiring, or a better job {better for you, but a real shame for your old company as they like you so much}, moving to a new area, attempting a dream. Yes, sometimes (depressingly often at present) it is because you get made redundant or things go bad with your managers, or HR take over the organisation. But even so, better to leave knowing you did so with your professional duty intact I think. It’s one way of winning in a losing situation.

If turning the “bus” metaphor into a “lottery” metaphor results in the response in your brain of “well, when I do leave rich and happy, I still want to leave a painful mess behind me” – then it may indicate that you better leave where you are working as soon as possible in any case? As it is not a good situation and you are deeply very unhappy about it.

Up until now I have sometimes used a far more gruesome but less fatal phrase for the concept of making sure things continue after you leave and can no longer help, which is “involved in a freak lawnmower accident”. As in, can’t type but not dead. I’m going to stop using it, I’ve decided that even with my macabre sense of humour, it really is not a good way to think about doing your job properly. Daniel, your attitude is better. Thank you.

Oh, if you went along to the conference you can get the latest version of Daniel’s talk slides from the UKOUG web site (try this link), otherwise, he has a copy here – pick “papers and presentations”. It has lots of notes on it explaining what the slides mean (ie, what he actually says), which I think is a very nice thing for him to have spent the time doing.